The Dancing Bear (2008-2009, Korea, NOLA, NZ)

You can't beat Wellington on a good day!

2009-12-06T11:23:00.008+13:00

The sun finally put in an appearance yesterday. Of course, it's gone again today; guess it had other things to do. But while it was out, I took advantage. I went for a long walk through Newtown, up Mt. Vic, down through Roseneath, around Oriental Bay and back to Jo & Wally's.

We went out for Indian food Friday night. The people at the table behind us insisted on moving because we were making so much noise. We had a bit of a laugh when we went downstairs to leave and realised they were sitting next to an even noisier crowd than us. Poetic justice.

Last night we had a BBQ at Jo and Wally's. We managed to fill 2 recycling bins with beer, wine and spirit bottles so the evening was a success. After, we went to Atomic to see Bill do his DJ thing. Jo and I got home around 2am; Stu got home around 6am and was in pretty bad shape apparently.

More pics here.

Friends & Family

2009-12-04T15:04:00.013+13:00

This, I think, will be my mantra for the next few months, repeated frequently with deep breaths in between. Yes, I'm back in NZ and wondering why I'm here.

I spent a lovely weekend with Courtney. We went to San Diego and checked out the zoo and spent a day driving around L.A. Then I began my 13 hour, teeth-grindingly frustrating flight to Auckland. Seriously folks, if you're travelling with kids, please drug them up before takeoff. I'm not talking drugging to the point of unconsciousness; I just want them mellowed out so they're not up all night playing, whining, screaming or kicking seat backs. Might I suggest marijuana.

I'm now in Wellington and, while I love seeing my friends again, NZ itself as been a bit of a disappointment so far. It's cold, grey, rainy, windy and wet... and it's summer. I'm wearing 3 layers and had to borrow a hat from Jo. And everything's crazy expensive here. I was looking for a haircut today. Nothing fancy; just a trim. The cheapest I was quoted was $72. I paid ₩15,000 in Korea and $15 in New Orleans. I paid $30 at the chemist for some personal items that I could've bought at Walgreens for about $8 in the States. Vodafone, bless them, reallocated my mobile number to someone else while I was away and wanted to charge me $40 for a new SIM card (no credit, just the card). New Zealand, it seems, has excelled in the art of price gouging while I was away.

I'm in Wgtn until Wednesday then I'm heading down to Christchurch. I don't know how long I'll stay but given that I'm already pining for New Orleans and I've been away less than a week, a long stay isn't looking to be on the cards.

Stuff Korean Moms Like

2009-10-16T12:56:00.003+13:00

Not feeling very well, I stayed in bed today catching up on emails, news etc and I came across the blog "Stuff Korean Moms Like". I follow a few blogs, mostly news, social commentaries etc but this one is now a must for me.

Anyone who is, has or knows a Korean mom should be able to relate and have a laugh. But even if you don't have, know or aren't a Korean mom, it's OK. Some of this stuff transcends cultural boundaries when it comes to moms (and other family members) - ever been asked "what are you crying about" as you're getting a hiding? Ever heard about the time your Grandfather had to walk 15 miles in the snow without shoes to get to school? This blog pokes fun at things like that but from a Korean perspective.

Just goes to show, people are crazy wherever they come from!

Two year old New Zealand girl found dead

2009-10-13T08:38:00.005+13:00

I've been keeping an eye on the disappearance of 2 year old Auckland girl, Aisling Symes. My mother told me about her parents' plea for her safe return so I had a look for it - it's heartbreaking stuff.

So I was sad to read that her body had been found in a drainpipe close to where she disappeared. I was really hoping she'd be found safe.

Korean food New Orleans style

2009-10-12T17:22:00.004+13:00

I just don't know how I feel about Korean food on a po boy:

Word gets around

2009-10-12T16:24:00.004+13:00

I was on a tour bus heading out to River Road the other day and I struck up a conversation with a lovely Australian woman who was in town with her husband and son. She was an experienced, certified teacher and was curious about my time in Korea. She was thinking about doing it and asked if I could recommend it. I can honestly say I found that a really hard question to answer. As much as I tried to be gracious and espouse the positives of Korea, I failed miserably.

I tried; I really did. I told her of the fantastic people I worked with, the culture, the food, the travel and the many friends I made during my time there and tried to leave it at that. Her next question was, of course, “So why did you leave?” I’m a terrible liar so I told her the truth – Korean government agencies have some horribly discriminatory, xenophobic and downright ridiculous policies in place and I couldn’t stomach it. She asked me to elaborate so I told her of the Education Office's E2 testing policy, how I refused the tests and how the Education Office revoked their offer of a 2nd contract. Needless to say, she was dumbstruck and didn’t understand how such a policy came about or how it would help prevent the spread of HIV/AIDS so I gave her a brief rundown of AES, Korea's yellow journalism etc.

In the end, despite me reiterating the positives of my Korean experience, she said that she felt the negatives would outweigh them as, like me, discrimination was something her and her husband felt very strongly about and that they’d have to cross Korea off the list.

Way to go Korea.

Why I heart NOLA!

2009-10-12T15:51:00.002+13:00

The people - New Orleans is such a friendly city. Even just walking down the street or sitting at a cafe, people will say hello or strike up a conversation. It’s so nice after Korea, where if people look at you, it’s generally with suspicion or curiosity. For the 1st time in a year, I don’t feel like I’m in a zoo.
Food – jeez, what can I say here?! Crawfish etouffe, jambalaya, gumbo, po boys, mufalettas, real southern fried chicken, good Mexican food, red beans & rice, maque choux, pecan pie, pralines and, of course, beignets. I’m lucky I’ve been walking so much because I’m eating like a pig.
Music – I love the street musicians and impromptu street parties. I was walking home the other week and right up the middle of the road came a brass band followed by a small parade of people. When I asked one guy what it was about he said “It’s Sunday.” Walking through the Quarter, you’re rarely out of earshot of someone playing something and it’s nice to just sit down in Jackson Square a take it all in.
Architecture – the French Quarter, Garden District, Irish Channel, Marigny, Bywater etc have so much to offer here. I’m in the Quarter almost every day and I never fail to see something new. The other day, after being here for a month, I found a side street I’d never seen before. There’s a lot of restoration going on and, thank goodness, it’s in keeping with the historic feel of the city. You won’t find any high-rise apartments in the historic areas and I find this and the lack of concrete refreshing after Korea.
History – I've always been fascinated with the city and I did a lot of study at university on New Orleans so it’s fascinating to visit the places I've learned about. In the Quarter, in particular, it’s common to see plaques on the side of buildings giving a history of the building, when it was built, who lived there etc.

It’s going to be tough leaving New Orleans. I’m hoping to stay until just after Halloween as I’ve still got so much I want to see and do here.

Pics here and here.

Welcome to New Orleans!

2009-10-12T15:23:00.004+13:00

I arrived in New Orleans on 3 September, just in time for Southern Decadence, the largest gay event in New Orleans. Decadence is the 3rd biggest festival in New Orleans, after Mardi Gras and Jazz Fest and it was quite an eye-opener. Basically, I arrived around the same time as about 20,000 gay guys.

I was sitting at the airport in Dallas waiting for my plane and looking around I thought ‘Damn, even if I didn’t know something was happening in New Orleans, I’d still know something was happening in New Orleans.’ About 100 overtly gay men who were already in party mode joined me at the boarding gate and I’m pretty sure I was the only straight person on the plane!

There were loads of parties in the Quarter but as I had serious jet lag, waking around 3am and hitting the wall around 5pm, I didn’t get to many of them. I did spend quite a bit of time in the Quarter during the day though and there was always something going on. I did go to the parade at the end of the weekend, which was Monday afternoon, and that was pretty cool. The costumes and atmosphere were awesome.

Decadence is quite different from the gay & lesbian Mardi Gras in Sydney, which seems to me to be more a celebration of the gay & lesbian community; Decadence seemed much more debauched and more a celebration of sexual freedom instead. I was pretty surprised at the lack of clothing and inhibitions I saw at Decadence but I think that was because I was used to ultra-conservative Korea where, if you listen to the official hype, homosexuality simply doesn’t exist. Here it’s in your face and celebrated, which I think is great.

There were such a variety of people at Decadence. You had older couples (think grandpas in leather), lesbian couples, straight couples, singles, the crazy Baptists picketing the parade etc. There were a lot of people who looked like they’d be more at home in a business suit next to wife and 2.5 kids and I did have to wonder how many of them come to Decadence, go wild for the weekend and then return to a ‘normal’ lives. The thing that struck me the most was the general acceptance of all lifestyles and how friendly everyone was, which was refreshing.

So all in all, it was a fantastic ‘welcome to New Orleans’...

More pictures here but be careful if you're viewing at work or school!

Why I'll Miss My Students

2009-08-29T00:36:00.002+12:00

Because they come up with things like this:

Leaving Korea

2009-08-29T00:09:00.008+12:00

Now that I can count the days until I leave Korea in single digits, I’ve been taking stock and thinking about what I’ll miss, what I’ll be happy to leave behind and what I'm looking forward to.

What I’ll miss:

Jen, Jared & Robb.
Dip-dyed doggies.
Earning money.
My students and my co-teacher, Sue, and her family, Big Paul and Little Paul.
Being able to walk around alone at night without worrying about personal safety (most of the time).
My high-speed, unlimited download Internet connection.
Cheap, delicious, healthy food.
Market-O Brownies.
The old ladies who work the fields near my school and the railway crossing guards I see everyday on the way to school.
Green, green rice fields.

What I won’t miss:

The over-emphasis on appearance.
Inappropriate dress sense. If you’re going out for a coffee, do you really need to wear a cocktail dress and 6 inch heels? If you’re climbing a mountain, do you really need to wear a belt for a skirt and pair it with… you got it – six inch heels?
Side-stepping mopeds and the occasional car coming at me on the sidewalk. If I wanted to be run over, I’d walk on the road.
Being followed around when I'm shopping.
The naked guys in the apartment across from me.
Being alternately invisible or a freak show.
Crazy food combinations - pizza with blueberry dipping sauce, corndogs with sugar etc.
Seeing people spitting or pissing in the streets. 'Nuff said.
Concrete - everywhere!
The Ulsan Education Office and their racist, discriminatory attitudes to NETs.

What I'm looking forward to:

Seeing my family and friends again.
Blending in (e.g. not being stared at so much).
Being able to converse easily with strangers.
A dinner of lamb chops, peas, baked pumpkin & mashed potatoes with gravy.
Beignets!
Exploring New Orleans again and taking in the architecture and history of the place.
Audubon park and zoo.
Mum's carrot cake.
Tormenting Janine's cat.
Being on vacation for 2+ months!

Korean Marketing At Its Best

2009-08-28T23:58:00.002+12:00

This is all kinds of dumb! I stopped at a chemist to pick up a few things, including these:

Now, having had in excess of 300 periods in my life, I can honestly say that ‘enjoy’ or any of its synonyms has never crossed my mind in relation to the experience. I can also confidently say that I’ve never had one that lasted only a day. Nor was it ever magical.

I bet it was a middle-aged, male marketing executive who came up with this brilliant slogan because the day I hear any woman say (with a straight face) “I can’t wait to get my period; it’ll be so much fun!” is the day I hang up my ovaries.

A Beautiful End (J.R. Richards)

2009-07-30T00:57:00.007+12:00

Wow!

New Orleans, here I come!

2009-07-13T00:10:00.005+12:00

After months of chewing over my options, I've decided to give up the idea of getting my job back and leave Korea. That's not to say I'm giving up on being a pain in the arse for the Ulsan Education Office though; there are a few things in the works on that front and they can carry on even after I leave the country. I'm very fortunate to have met someone who knows the issues inside out and is happy to keep pushing them.

So, I'm leaving Korea on 3 September for New Orleans. I'm looking for a place to sublet for a month (or 2, depending on the rent and what's available). Basically, I'm giving myself a bit of downtime to chill out, explore the city and live like a local. And if I can pick up some part-time work while I'm there, so much the better. I'll head back to New Zealand in either October or November and may visit some friends & family along the way. I'll start looking for other teaching jobs in the new year.

It feels good to finally make a decision.

My decision to leave Korea was based on a few things. As much as I like it here, it's left me feeling pretty discouraged about human nature on some fronts. The people I've met here have been kind, generous and welcoming. My school has been great to work for. My students are awesome and I'll miss them. But when I hear about or experience things like an 11 year old committing suicide or institutionalised discrimination by government agencies, it eventually beats you down and leaves you feeling pretty jaded.

I've also been feeling the futility of teaching within the Korean education system. The other day, we were giving the kids a quiz on prepositions. I was reading the sentence and the kids had to circle the correct picture. My co-teacher was doing something else for half the test and the kids were doing OK and working things out. Then my co-teacher finishes what she's doing and starts paying attention to the quiz. It took me all of 2 seconds to realised she was giving them the answers in Korean so they stopped trying. We were also working on days of the week and I was giving the kids a pre-test to see how much they knew. They were working it out fine until my co-teacher says "They don't know" and then tells them the answers {sigh}.

I've worked hard for the last year to encourage my kids to think and work things out for themselves. I've seen the joy and sense of achievement they have when they get it right and the determination to try again when they don't. It's hard work and takes a lot of patience but it's rewarding for me and them. I think Korean teachers do the kids and their native co-teachers a huge disservice by taking away any incentive for them to make an effort. And to give them the idea that if you don't get it perfect the 1st time you obviously don't know it must be so demoralising for them. It cheats them out of the joy of learning.

But that's how things are done here. Independent thought, critical thinking and individualism are simply not encouraged. The kids will listen and repeat until the cows come home but they have no idea what they're saying and little incentive to find out. And after a while, I think it's natural that you start thinking "What's the point?"

This is not to say that I wouldn't come back to Korea. But I think I'd only do it if I could work in Seoul and if they sorted out the HIV/AIDS & drug tests. If the Korean government continues to actively discriminate against foreigners, there are other places I'd rather go.

Could I recommend Korea? Well, if you don't mind the feelings of hopelessness that come with teaching in the public system and being treated like an indentured servant by the education offices, I'd say come along but don't invest too much emotionally. But otherwise, I can't, in all good conscience, recommend it as a worthwhile and rewarding thing to do.

Man Caught Installing Spy Cam in Woman’s Home

2009-07-09T16:23:00.003+12:00

Well, this has 'ewww' written all over it.

A 26-year-old salaried worker was caught Wednesday for installing a spy camera in the bedroom of a female teacher ``out of a curiosity,’’ police said. [more]

I'm sorry, but stealing the key to someone's house, copying it, breaking in and installing a camera in her closet is more than 'curiosity.'

Oh Korea... you break my heart sometimes

2009-07-05T19:04:00.010+12:00

My time in Korea is coming to an end and I'm at the point where I can count down the days in double digits. However, it's not final. Everything is still up in the air in regards to losing my job for refusing the HIV/AIDS & drug tests. There's a chance that I could get my job back but it's too much to go into here. But I'm feeling pretty cynical about Korea and, after the last few days, and I'm not even sure I want to stay.

There have been a number of articles in the paper maligning English teachers. While I'm becoming more immune to it, it's been prolific this week. As much as I'd like to let it roll off me, it bothers me. Just for once, I'd like to see media story about English teachers that makes me smile rather than grind my teeth. "You don't like it, don't read it.", I hear you say. I wish I could but I've never believed that ignorance is bliss and I'm wondering why I'm considering staying in a country where foreigners are seen as a necessary evil rather than a valuable resource.

But what's really upset me is this: an 11 year old student of a friend committed suicide by jumping from the 13th floor of his apartment building. Eleven years old.

I feel terrible for Kerry and his co-workers, who I don't even know. Kerry's Facebook post is below and his heartache for the boy, his family, his co-workers is palpable. No one should have to deal with the death of a child, whether it be your own child or someone else's. But to know that the child ended his own life makes the situation so much more distressing.

I teach 11 year olds and it seems incongruous to think about them in relation to suicide. On the whole, my 4th graders are a pretty happy bunch but you never know what's going on on the inside. The idea of any one of them feeling so disconsolate that they commit or even consider suicide really bothers me. I've got a girl in grade 6 who worries me. She painfully shy, has no friends and has a general air of despondency. It's taken me 9 months just to to get a smile out of her and I can't help but wonder if she thinks about suicide.

I had 2 friends commit suicide shortly after high school and, while I'm not unsympathetic to the turmoil one must be feeling in order to get to a point where suicide is a viable option, I prefer to save my sympathies for their family and friends. I think it's a selfish choice and I'm still angry at Geoff and Steven. I'll never forget visiting Geoff's family 3 years after his suicide and seeing his father's anguish and bewilderment. But Geoff and Steven were adults and they alone are responsible for their decisions. This boy was 11 years old and 11 year olds can't possibly be aware of the consequences of such a monumental decision as suicide.

What could be so bad that an 11 year old thinks the only option is suicide? In this case, he was caught stealing and his teacher called his parents. The fact that this child felt that suicide was a better alternative than facing his parents and sucking up his punishment has me asking all sorts of questions. Do Korean kids believe their parents' love is conditional on them being a dutiful son/daughter? Are Korean parents so wanting in the emotional department that they're telling their kids (directly or indirectly) that, unless they're perfect, they're worthless? Where's the mental health care, counselling or support for people who are considering suicide or dealing with the suicide of a loved one? Does Korea, as a whole, care at all for the emotional and mental well-being of its citizens or does it think that their Han blood and kimchi make them immune mental illness?

In this specific case, will the school support the teacher in question or will he be vilified for simply telling the parents that their child was caught stealing? Will there be any support for this boy's schoolmates? Memorial service, a moment of silence? Will the school even acknowledge what's happened? I can't see it happening.

And I'm asking myself if I want to continue living in a country that seems to show so little regard for human life or the human psyche?

Reflections on a 4th Grade Suicide
I guess it’s appropriate that there is a dreary rain falling as I stagger home from a feeble attempt to drown the sorrow of my saddest day in Korea. The usual neon and gaudiness of Ilsan Beach are shrouded in a gray fog that exactly mirrors my mood.

What began as a typical day of six classes with the sweetest Korean children in the world, has morphed into a tragic day for a child, his parents, his teachers, his classmates, and ultimately for Korea.

A cute little eleven year old boy, who, just today, rubbed the hair on my arm and said, “Kerry, teacher, “soft!” is now dead. What makes a fourth grade boy leap to his death from his 13th floor apartment window?

The first thing I heard about Choi Hyo Won’s death was from my Korean co-teacher, Kim Min Jo. She is the strongest, most confident, professional teacher I have encountered in Korea and when she came trembling into our room and said, “There is a problem” I knew instantly that there was. She said one of her boyfriend’s students had been caught stealing money for the second time, and, for the second time, her boyfriend, Jeong Chang Su, had called the boy’s parents to let them know what had happened. Before the boy’s parents returned home from work, Hyo Won had jumped from their 13th floor window, apparently choosing death over facing his parents for his second offense of stealing.

Min Jo, whose English is usually impeccable, said, “He might be died.” She was on the verge of tears, which, for Min Jo, is unheard of. Her words were punctuated with sobs that caused her delicate shoulders to rise and fall with every phrase.

There was an emergency meeting of all teachers (except the native English teacher) and when Min Jo returned she said that Hyo Won had died. The tears streamed down her face and the sobbing was the saddest expression of emotion I have seen from a Korean since I arrived. She cried for the child, she cried for her boyfriend, Chang Su, and she cried for every teacher in our school, when she said, “He died.” I tried to hide my tears as I put my hand on her shoulder and said, “I’m so sorry.” I felt so utterly inadequate and foolish that I could think of nothing more comforting to say.

Min Jo was sad for the child and afraid for Chang Su. She said the parents would probably sue him for “huge money” and that he might lose his job as a teacher. They have only been dating for a couple of months, but I’m sure marriage is in their future and I could see she was crying not only at the death of a child, but at the potential death of her dream to marry Chang Su.

Chang Su is a 32 year old teacher who is easily the most handsome, the funniest, the kindest and the most considerate teacher at our school. He is a gentle giant who is almost as tall as I am. I always tell him that I am going to be his agent and take him to America and make him the first Korean male super model in the US. He has the darkest skin of any teacher at our school and Min Jo has the lightest and I always tell them that their babies will be a perfect hue.

Chang Su was at the hospital when Hyo Won died, but he immediately had to return to school to type up a report about what he had said and done and then was required by the police to return to the hospital and stay until midnight. While he was typing his report, I went to his room and did the only thing I could think of to let him know I cared about him. I squeezed his shoulder without saying a word, and he said, “thank you.”

Despite my lack of Korean and his limited English, I hope he knew I loved him and cared for him. I went back to my desk and cried for Hyo Won, for his parents, for Chang Su, for Min Jo, and for Korea.

Pot, meet kettle

2009-07-03T14:29:00.005+12:00

So, education offices around the country demand HIV/AIDS tests from foreigners because we're deemed sexual miscreants with disordered sex lives. However, we're not the ones landing in the papers for paying for sex.

The blatant hypocrisy I see at times makes it hard to remember why I like Korea.

E2 Visa regs go to the Korean Constitutional Court

2009-07-02T22:45:00.003+12:00

After so many journalistics screw ups, is it possible that this reporter is finally starting to use his brain rather than doing his usual cut 'n paste hack job?

I'll be watching this case with interest as it's closely related to the issues I've had.

I dunno...

2009-06-26T21:51:00.005+12:00

I find it amazing that teachers in Korea can be "dismissed or have their licenses suspended" for expressing a political opinion that runs contrary to the government line when a teacher who beats a student so badly they need medical treatment for 12 weeks gets off with a fine and a warning. So much for the punishment fitting the crime.

Honestly...

HIV in Korea - it's just like going back in time!

2009-06-23T21:27:00.020+12:00

Ben Wagner has written a great article calling out a group on its scare mongering, bullsh*t regarding HIV/AIDS testing and foreigners. I’m not going to name the group because the less press these bozos get, the better. But here in Korea, we all know who they are. This group spends its time ~~stalking~~ monitoring native English teachers, trying to gather proof of their ‘misdeeds’ in order to have them deported. I once heard a story that they followed a teacher for 154 days and gathered proof that he once picked his nose in public. Really, do these people not have jobs & lives? They do it under the guise of ‘protecting the public’ but, IMHO, they’re just racist, ignorant toe rags with too much time on their hands.

Wagner's article and an interview with Cleve Jones discussing the current gay rights issues in the U.S. got me thinking of the parallels between the U.S. attitudes to HIV/AIDS 25 years ago and Korean attitudes today. I’m going to generalise and ramble but this is a blog and these are my own personal opinions so I figure it's allowed.

I’m a child of the late 70s & 80s and, when I was about 13, my uncle Stuart announced he was gay. My own upbringing (my parents have a ‘live and let live’ attitude) precluded me from seeing him any differently but I remember thinking that his choice to live openly gay meant that he was opening himself up to harassment, discrimination and sometimes violence. I also remember thinking that I understood why he'd stayed in the closet for so long and even married at one point if this was what he had to cope with. Stuart was diagnosed with HIV in mid-80s, back when it was thought of as a 'gay disease'. He died in 1993 and it's always saddened me that he didn't live long enough to see the shift in attitude towards the homosexual community and those suffering from HIV/AIDS that we've seen over the last 15 years. It’s still far from perfect but it’s also far from what it was then.

These days, most countries have a more enlightened attitude to HIV/AIDS. We understand the many ways it’s spread, how it’s not spread and what we can do to prevent it. Voluntary testing is encouraged and I know many people who feel genuinely proud that they regularly get HIV tests (hell, I’m one of them!). Does this mean that we sleep around and shoot crack into our eyeballs? Absolutely not. It means we’re smart enough and responsible enough to get tested irrespective of our risk levels. The lack of social stigma around such tests means we can do so freely and without shame. And professional ethics mean we feel assured that our results will remain between us and our doctors.

The social climate in Korea regarding HIV/AIDS reminds me very much of the climate of fear, ignorance and complacency that pervaded the U.S. when HIV/AIDS first cropped up. I remember seeing a newscast that started with “There’s a new disease amongst the gay population” and being horrified that anyone could make such a prejudicial statement on TV when almost nothing was known about the disease or how it was spread. We discussed HIV/AIDS in a life skills class in high school and most of my classmates felt the issue didn't affect them, as they were straight and didn't know or didn't hang around with any gay people. I remember worrying how this attitude would affect my uncle in regards to even more harassment, discrimination and vilification.

At the time, pubic and personal opinions seemed pretty narrow-minded and ignorant to me. Looking back, it seems positively medieval. And yet, here are the same attitudes showing up in Korea in 2009. The difference is that instead of Koreans seeing HIV/AIDS as a 'gay disease', they see it as a 'foreigner disease'. I’m no expert on the Korean mind-set but it seems to me that there’s a huge stigma attached to issues around sexual health here. STDs, abortions and adultery occur but they are usually denied or, more passively, never openly acknowledged.

So why is HIV/AIDS the 'foreigner' disease'? I think this mostly comes down to a combination of groups like those mentioned in Wagner's article and sensational stories printed by an irresponsible media. Plus, English teachers are a soft target. Many of us don't read or speak Korean so we don't really know what's being said about us and can't respond in any meaningful way; some know but don't care. And the conditions of our visas are very tight so we're limited in how we can organise ourselves. In short, we can't really fight back. Also, I suppose, in a warped kind of way, it's emotionally and mentally satisfying to lay all the ills of your country at the feet of the 'outsiders'.

Why is it that Korea seems so behind the times when it comes to HIV/AIDS? I think that comes down to Korea’s general unwillingness to or fear of looking at the ugly side of human behaviour. If you're Korean and you believe the myth, you don't have to worry about HIV/AIDS. You're safe as long as you don't consort with those dirty foreigners. But if you explore the reasons why HIV/AIDS is not a foreigner disease, you have to (collectively & individually) look at how it's really spread and do some personal risk assessment, which means looking at your own behaviour and whether it puts you at risk. And Koreans are not above engaging in risky behaviour. This, combined with the ‘it doesn't affect me’ attitude and stigma surrounding HIV testing leaves them at greater risk of contracting and spreading the disease. Maybe blissful ignorance is better in the short-term but it’s certainly dangerous in the long-term.

Western countries, on the other hand, have turned self-examination into a thriving industry (from Dr. Phil to Jerry Springer) so I think we’re more comfortable doing some self-fessing-up. I’d like to think that a good percentage of us understand that if we engage in risky behaviour such as unprotected sex or sharing needles, we’re at risk. Thus we understand that it’s prudent to get some education on how to best protect ourselves. Forearmed is forewarned after all. In addition, if/when we get tested, we don't have to worry about who our medical records get passed to, unlike here in Korea.

But most importantly, I think we fully understand that HIV/AIDS doesn't care what blood runs in your veins, your heritage, your skin colour, religious affiliation or sexual orientation. It’s an indiscriminate killer.

Do you know f*cking?

2009-06-22T22:35:00.008+12:00

Today was rainy so my co-teacher came to pick me up for school. She has a pretty thick accent so I often have to be on the ball when listening to her. I'm not a morning person at the best of times and I didn't sleep last night so 'on the ball' I wasn't. As we arrived at school, we had a short conversation that went like this (italics are what I didn't dare say):

CT: We will f*ck over there.
Me: (Um, you're very attractive an' all but I like boys) Excuse me?
CT: F*ck. F*cking. Do you you know f*cking?
Me: (Well sure, who doesn't.) Uh, can you spell that?
CT: p-a-r-k

Wow, that could've been awkward. Jennifer has had a similar mix-up so I should've known better!

The other flub came at lunch time when my co-worker said to me "We're having crap today. I hope you like crap." Now, I know school lunches can be bad but, really, there's no call for that! And the lunch lady was standing right next to us. Upon looking in the pot, I realised we were having crab.

Study on rape in South Africa

2009-06-20T19:03:00.004+12:00

This caught my attention while listening to the BBC (and nearly made me throw up).

Study Finds Shocking Incidence of Rape in South Africa
By Delia Robertson
Johannesburg
19 June 2009
More than a quarter of men surveyed in a study in South Africa said they had committed rape. Nearly half the respondents said they had raped more than once. {more}

Human Rights Watch on the E2 Visas

2009-06-20T13:59:00.006+12:00

I'm not sure how much weight the opinion of Human Rights Watch has in South Korea but this is a nice start. Given South Korea's inclination to 'save face', the more international pressure put on them in regards to its HIV/AIDS tests for E2s, the better.

Letter to the National Human Rights Commission of Korea
June 19, 2009

Mr. Lee Seong-Taek
Investigator
Anti-Discrimination Division
National Human Rights Commission of Korea

Dear Mr. Lee:
Human Rights Watch (HRW) is pleased to have the opportunity to submit this letter for your consideration in conjunction with the National Human Rights Commission of Korea's (NHRCK) upcoming conference on Korea's E-2 Teaching Visa policy. We strongly urge the NHRCK to find that the existing E-2 Teaching Visa policy is discriminatory and to recommend the abolition of the policy's HIV testing requirement. {more}

Weekend in Jeollanam-do

2009-06-18T22:34:00.006+12:00

The rest are here.

The Korean samba... apparently.

2009-06-18T22:24:00.004+12:00

Sue and I like to start our classes with something a little different...

How many times do I have to say it!?

2009-06-18T19:04:00.015+12:00

I help teach an 'after school' class with a teacher from a hagwon. Until recently, she taught 1 class on Monday afternoon and we shared a class on Thursday afternoon. No longer. Without any notice, she changed the schedule to accommodate some personal tasks. How did I find out? Why, I turned up to class and the door was locked, of course! This wasn't a problem since the classroom is next door to my office but I was a bit miffed that she hadn't bothered to call or email to tell me things had changed.

Now she's trying to wrangle me into teaching this class at some strange times. The conversation so far has gone like this (and I'm paraphrasing here):

CT: Can you teach in the mornings during term.
Me: No, I teach regular classes in the mornings.
CT: Can you change it?
Me: Um, no. It's set by the school. I can teach in the afternoon.
CT: OK, can you come in before 8am and teach then?
Me: No. I don't start work until 8:30. I can teach in the afternoon.
CT: OK. Can you teach during the holidays?
Me: Sure, as long as it doesn't interfere with the 2 camps I'm doing. Then I gave her the dates/times I'm teaching.
CT: You're busy when I want to teach in the mornings. Can you come in before 8am in the holidays?
Me: No. I don't start work until 8:30. I can teach in the afternoon.
CT: It's not convenient for me. Can you teach Saturdays?
Me: No.
CT: You're not teaching that week. Can you teach in the mornings then?
Me: No, I'm on holiday in Seoul then.
CT: Can you change it?
Me: No

Yeah, I'm a little irritated. I understand she has some personal things to take care of and that it involves trips to the hospital. But this is country where people go to the hospital for a sniffle and she's assured me she's OK. Nevertheless, I'm prepared to negotiate and teach when I can during working hours, when I'm free to accommodate her (my schedule is set by my school, after all).

Having said that, I don't think it's unreasonable to be consulted before changing a schedule I'm expected to follow (how can I follow it if I don't know what it is?). What I do think is unreasonable is for someone to get cranky when I don't accommodate them by not wanting to teach at the crack of dawn or on weekends.

Ain't that the truth

2009-06-18T11:59:00.002+12:00

Props to Radhika.

Homesick...

2009-06-16T17:28:00.009+12:00

The funky little kiwi

2009-06-13T01:25:00.005+12:00

I got this from my friend for my birthday. I think he's pretty cute. Thanks Jo!

Separated at birth?

2009-06-12T15:52:00.005+12:00

Yes, I get paid for this!

2009-06-11T23:09:00.005+12:00

Grades 1/2

Grades 3/4

Yonhap: Unfit, Foulmouthed, Drunken English Teachers Running Rampant

2009-06-11T18:58:00.011+12:00

You mean coming to school drunk and making the kids write ‘I don’t want to study’ 100 times is wrong?

I must have missed the memo...

F**k me {sorry Mum}, but it never stops. This piece of shite from Yonhap news makes it hard for me to remember that I actually quite like Korea.

Where to start:

"teachers quit without notice or resigned for reasons including inability to fit in, work, and illness"

By 'inability to fit in', I presume the Ministry means that they didn't do their 'duty' and put up with co-teachers not coming to class prepared (or not coming at all), schools who turn a blind eye when Korean teachers beat, molest and drive students to suicide and that they expected to be treated with dignity and respect... yeah, shame on them.

Next:

"Ministry statistics show that from January to April of last year 54 native-speaker teachers quit without notice or resigned... That was the number for four months, and is equivalent to 160 in a year."

Sure it is... if roughly 54 keep quitting every 3 months or so! Clearly he had access to the statistics, which were last year's from what the article said, so why not state the yearly average? I guess it didn't sound as good.

And look at this guy’s sources:

“parents and teachers of middle school D”
“A teacher at S high school”
“An English teacher named Choi who works at a high school in Jeollanam-do”
“One teacher who was worked with a native-speaker teacher for 18 months”
“One elementary school teacher in Seoul”
“A teacher at an elementary school in Mokdong”

Credible? I don't think so. It seems to me that he’s pulling this out of his arse. I'm sure I could go on but I don't want to. It just makes me angry. Honestly, the standards of the Korean media never fail to disgust (and occasionally entertain) me.

If I was Korean:

I'd be ashamed at the appalling lack of professionalism the media here so often displays;
I'd be embarrassed that the media is portraying my country as a racist, xenophobic cesspool;
I'd be demanding that the media lift their game;
I'd be demanding some accountability from those 'journalists' who continue to write this kind of biased, sensationalist muckraking crap.

As long as the media are not held accountable, I think we're going to see an escalation of this type of reporting and greater demonisation of English teachers.

F**ktards {sorry Mum}

Things I learned today

2009-06-11T15:49:00.015+12:00

On the cute side:

You can keep 1st and 2nd graders entertained for ages by telling them in Korean that you don't speak Korean;
My 1st and 2nd graders think I'm 25;
1st and 2nd graders are kinda dumb.

And on the cranky side:

The best way to punish one kid for being apathetic & pigheaded is to tell the rest of the class that the longer we have to stop to deal with said kid, the less time they all have to play a game;
It's possible for a 10 year old boy to give you a seriously pervy look {shudder};
It's possible to be stalked by a 6 year old girl;
It's easy for a 1st grader to get a crayon up their nose but not so easy to get it back out;
5th graders are the new 6th graders.

Next time I'm going to lock these kids in a windowless room... with a fan on.

Please be a hypocrite, just for the weekend

2009-06-10T11:59:00.004+12:00

I just got the ~~summons~~ invite to the 'EPIK 2009 Summer Reunion' in July.

If I read this right, the government agency that has just refused to re-employ me because I object to discriminatory and xenophobic tests wants me to come to Seoul for the weekend and tell everyone how much I've enjoyed my Korean experience...

I'm thinking no.

Bills Seek Tighter Screening of Foreign Teachers

2009-06-09T23:38:00.012+12:00

What now?! This from the Korean times:

A lawmaker proposed bills to strengthen the screening of foreign English teachers in Korea, Tuesday.
Rep. Choi Young-hee of the main opposition Democratic Party submitted the bills obliging foreign English teachers to present criminal record and health check documents, including HIV-AIDS tests, before they are hired at public or private schools.

I don't understand where Rep. Choi Young-hee is coming from here. Surely he knows that foreign teachers are already obliged "to present criminal record and health check documents, including HIV-AIDS " and have been since December 2007. Or is this part of the effort to make it law, rather than just a 'policy memo'?

In addition, we are not allowed to present health checks, including HIV/AIDS test, when we are hired as we must have them at a designated hospital, once we've already entered Korea.

And as for this gem:

``E-2 visa holders, once caught for taking drugs or sexually harassing children, were often found to be rehired at another school or hagwon,'' said Yeo Jun-sung, an aide for Rep. Choi.

...evidence please. Oh wait, there is none. I hate it when dickheads in charge make this type of, dare I say it, unqualified statement. Besides, if they've been 'caught', what the hell are they doing being hired elsewhere?

And finally:

Meanwhile, foreign teachers' groups are urging the Korean government to test all teachers, whether they are Koreans or foreigners.

I would have thought that the author, Kang Shin-who, would know better than to print something like this, given that he's only just been called out on such inaccurate and inflammatory statements. Clearly this 'reporter' can't find his arse with 2 hands and a map. Or as my Dad would say "Dumb as a bag of rocks."

This is probably a pretty accurate summary of this journalistic masterpiece.

Swine Flu in N.Z.

2009-06-09T17:39:00.006+12:00

Guy, a friend in Wellington, has been quarantined for suspected swine flu exposure. And my sister's friend has been quarantined in Christchurch.

I'm thinking (tongue firmly in cheek) they should now round up, test and quarantine foreigners in Wellington and Christchurch, just to be on the safe side... or would that be racist?

How to exhaust small Korean children

2009-06-07T20:45:00.010+12:00

We were learning body parts again, this time for my grade 1 & 2 after school class so we played the old favorite - Doctor.

Clearly, these kids have bright futures in the medical profession... unless you say you've hurt your hand and they bandage your head. Thank god I didn't teach them the word "amputation"

Love the drop-n-roll technique employed here.

Finished by a rousing rendition of Head, Shoulders, Knees & Toes.

I'm happy to say that by the end of this lesson, they were all shiny, flushed and exhausted. Not entirely sure how much they learned but we had fun. I'll miss these kids a lot when I leave.

Salvation was almost mine!

2009-06-07T19:21:00.004+12:00

Ha ha - I just answered my door after some ~~pounding~~ insistent knocking to find a woman bowing at me. As she straightened up, she started talking. When she realised I wasn't Korean, she froze, got a frightened look on her face and ran off down the stairs.

The pamphlets in her hand emblazoned with Jesus tell me she was on a mission to convert. Apparently, as one of the barbarian invaders of Korea, my soul is beyond redemption.

Oh how I hope she comes back and goes across the hall... to Bee's!

Kevin Rudd, I love you!

2009-06-07T18:06:00.006+12:00

The Australian government, for some inexplicable reason, decided to give me $900, despite the fact that I'm not Australian and I left Australia 18 months ago. Not wanting to seem churlish, I accepted their donation and hit iTunes.

Now I'm listening to Dr John, Nina Simone, Billie Holiday and John Boutte and seriously wishing I was back in New Orleans.

Kevin Rudd, I hate you!

Hongdae Vampires

2009-06-06T17:42:00.013+12:00

Nice bit of blatantly racist journalism by The Pressian, translated by Korea Beat.

It speaks for itself; I got nothin'...

Suicide in Korea

2009-06-06T16:32:00.008+12:00

Hot on the trail of Roh Moo-hyu's suicide, my grade 5/6 after-school class put together presentations for a story they made up. They went for the usual themes; boys= monsters, big guns and lots of blood and girls = princesses, romance, friendships etc. Nice to see them bucking the stereotypes. Anyway, 2 of the girls wrote a story that kind of disturbed me. To paraphrase:

The princess was very stupid - but that's OK because she was also very beautiful. Her brother, who presumably was even more stupid than her (but probably just as beautiful), lost all the family's money. So the princess decided to dig the family out of it's pit the only way she knew how. "By getting a job and working hard?", I hear you ask. No, the other way - getting a rich husband.

She met a handsome prince who fell in love with her and didn't care that she was poor. But she whined "give me money" so often that he told her to hit the road. Then she met another handsome prince (if this country is awash with handsome princes, I've never seen them) and fell in love with him and started up the whole "give me money" thing again. But turns out he was poor... so she killed herself.

Keeping in mind that these girls are no more than 12 years old (with limited English), I would like to think that their values are by no means set in stone. However, that these values are rearing their heads at the tender age of 12 alarmed me. The emphasis on beauty and wealth as the only means to an end galls me. The idea that the only way for girls to succeed was to marry a rich man is equally gallling to me, as is the idea that once you marry a rich man, you're automatically entitled to his money.
　
Then, worst of all, there's the suicide angle. Korea excels in suicide (#1 in the OECD), from the recent spate of celebrity suicides to the suicide of ex-President Roh Moo-hyu, who was being investigated for corruption. Suicide seems to be considered a viable problem solving option no matter how minor your problem is. One of my friends had a student jump from the 4th floor of their school because she was caught smoking and the school was going to tell her parents. I know that when you're a teenager everything is the end of the world but I don't understand how suicide would be considered a solution to this problem.

The Korean media tend to glamorise suicide by portraying celebrities who commit it as tragic starlets (they're generally women) preyed upon by greedy, lecherous men (they generally are, in these cases). I'm not saying these particular women have no reason to complain or be unhappy with their situations. From what I've seen, female celebrities have to put up with all sorts of pressure, bullying, sexual exploitation and downright violence just to get ahead. But how about exploring other options (like a career change) before taking such drastic actions? Maybe they did and there were no other options, and that is sad. It would show just how much Korea drops the ball when it comes mental health.

I also think that government agencies do little to discourage suicide. For example, as soon as Roh committed suicide, the investigation into the alleged corruption was called off, thus saving face and preventing any shame falling on his family. I could see how, in Roh's mind, suicide was a win-win situation.

And Korea's solution to stopping suicide? Let's ban all Internet searches on words pertaining to suicide and encourage people to report suspicious groups (group suicide presumably) to the police. My issues with this are three-fold:

What if people who are considering suicide are looking for places to go to get help? Finding help should be encouraged, not discouraged like this.
What are the police going to do with someone who may (or may not) be contemplating suicide? Arrest them? I doubt the makers of this policy have thought that far ahead.
These ideas seem to only pay lip-service to the real issue of why people are committing suicide. I think it's just plain stupid and seems to be akin to putting a band aid on a severed artery.

I think some hard questions need to be asked as to why so many Korean people are committing suicide. If they deal with it from a mental health point of view, they may just bring down the numbers.

And my advice to this princess - get off your stupid, lazy (but beautiful) arse, study hard, get a job and don't be such a schmuck.

Awesome Flash Mob

2009-06-06T12:40:00.010+12:00

One of times I love flash mobs (doesn't happen often):

Choi Jin sil sued for...

2009-06-05T16:15:00.023+12:00

wait for it, being beaten. Apparently:

"Models who failed to maintain appropriate dignity as representatives of the products they represent should compensate for the damages caused to their advertiser... The Supreme Court reversed the original ruling and ruled in favor of a construction company that filed a suit against the deceased actress Choi Jin-sil, who committed suicide last October."

And just what did this woman do to "depreciate the company's social reputation" apart from being beaten? Apparently, she had the gall to not hide it:

"However, in August, Choi appeared on television and newspapers with her face full of bruises, allegedly caused by the violence of her then husband... "

The article goes on to quote the Supreme Court as saying that Choi breached her contract because of her "failure to maintain an adequate image." The article also states that Choi was supposed to advertise "dignity and happiness" and that, as the apartment's model, "she was under the obligation to act accordingly."

Perhaps they should've put a clause in the contract to oblige her husband to act accordingly.

I find the whole 'blame the victim' tone of this article and the court case itself disgusting. Victims of domestic violence who have the balls to step up and highlight the realities of it should be applauded, not punished again like this, especially when she's not even here to defend herself (that part really is just too obscene to even comment on right now)!

And the gem of the article for me:

"A lower court said in an earlier ruling that Choi could not be held responsible for depreciating the image of the apartment or the company as she had not been proven guilty of causing her former husband's violence."

Well, full points to the lower court for ruling in her favor but, really, why is 'cause' even an issue? Yes, I know, I'm in Korea and things are different here. But I used to do counselling at a women's refuge and I can, with 100% certainty, say that I never heard any excuse good enough to cause such violence.

For the courts to even bring the cause of the violence into the argument (let alone base their decision on it) shows me how far Korea has to go before it can be considered the 'enlightened' country it wants to be.

More here, including the company in question, who I hope will face some serious public shaming over this.

E2 Visa challenge

2009-06-04T16:31:00.009+12:00

Nicely written article about the challenge to the E2 regs. And here.

But I think this kind of drops the ball. I would've liked to have seen more details on why he thinks the ban should be lifted because in Korea, when an older man talks, people listen. Maybe over the coming days...

Another reason I have issues with health checks

2009-06-04T13:05:00.006+12:00

I was talking to a friend who told me something they saw when they were having their 'dirty foreigner' health check. The hospital staff had a stack of test results of the foreigner health checks, complete with pictures attached. My friend speaks pretty good Korean and apparently the staff were wandering around, showing each other the photos (with test results on full display) and quizzing each other on who they thought was prettier.

I guess the concepts of 'patient privacy' and 'professional ethics' haven't reached this hospital or these staff members yet... but clearly dumbassery has.

Happy birthday Pa!

2009-06-02T18:10:00.010+12:00

I miss you

Loving this at the moment!

2009-06-02T16:28:00.013+12:00

J.R. Richards' new album, A Beautiful End, is awesome. Much like Dishwalla's Opaline, I can listen to this over and over.

It can't be all bad at my school right now - they're still making me special meals sans mushrooms on the days we have mushroom dishes, like today. I guess they don't want a repeat of the mushroom tea incident.

Neither to do I, for that matter.

What I'm missing...

2009-06-01T18:56:00.013+12:00

Ass-hattery!

2009-06-01T14:44:00.021+12:00

Things are kind of getting back to normal with my co-teacher. Whenever she brings up the subject of last week, I opt out of the discussion. While I'm no push-over, I don't like fighting and I certainly don't see any point in getting into it. Nothing good can come out of 'discussing' it further.

I'm still pretty peeved with my principal and vice-principal though. When they found out I may be going to Vietnam in July, they expressed concern that I wouldn't come back. When it was looking like I'd be going to New Zealand in August, they expressed concern that I wouldn't come back. I laughed it off those times but when we had the meeting last week and I said I wouldn't take the tests/re-sign, they again expressed concern that I would fail to finish my contract by - you guessed it - running away. And today, they seemed surprised that I'd returned from Seoul and turned up to work. It's gone past the point where I can laugh it off.

And my response to this is "F**k you, you ass-hats!" I've always been on time and prepared for class. I've been out of town on numerous occasions and always came back. I've taken 2 sick days since I've been here. I've dragged my arse into school when I've had bronchitis and laryngitis and pretty much mimed my classes and when I sprained my back and couldn't stand up straight. I've done absolutely nothing to merit this kind of distrust.

Today they're trying to be extra nice to me but every time I see them, I'm paranoid that they're thinking something like:

"There's our waegookin. I hope she's hasn't been shooting smack into her eyeballs, molesting our students & spreading her HIVness. Wait, she was in Seoul this weekend? And she didn't run away!? Wow, we dodged a bullet there! Wait, she was in Seoul this weekend & she came back! Oh shit, we should check her for swine flu!"

I think I need to spend some more time out of Ulsan. Or maybe I just need to go for a run.

It's the small things

2009-06-01T01:09:00.012+12:00

A flying weekend in Seoul - just what I needed to get me out of my "F**k you, Korea!" funk. A couple of things that reminded me what I loved about this place:

At a coffee shop I had this conversation with the girl at the counter:

Me:     Can I have steamed milk please? (it was late-ish)
Her:     Would you like that hot or cold?
Me:     Sorry?
Her:     Hot or cold?
Me:     Umm.... hot would be nice, thanks.

And:

Standing at the traffic lights, I heard a siren. Now, in my time here, I've never seen traffic move aside or even slow down for police cars or ambulances so I was surprised when some cars didn't go on a green and others moved aside. "Wow," I thought "I've gotten cynical about Korean drivers. Nuts to me." My hopes were dashed when, through the intersection, sirens blazing, blows a chicken delivery guy on a moped.

And:

Exiting the subway car sometimes proves difficult, what with all the people pushing to get on (it's not as bad as Kuala Lumpur though). I was having trouble doing so this afternoon and the doors were starting to close. In light of the ~~foreigner~~ swine flu outbreak, I decided the quickest way was to start coughing. It was like watching the Red Sea part.

And lastly,

On the train back, an impossibly cute girl who'd escaped from her parents runs up to me, plonks her counting book in my lap and proceeds to count to 10 in English very, very loudly while pointing at the numbers to show me how smart she is. In my opinion, children on long-haul public transport should be stowed away in overhead lockers but she was just so cute and sweet that I couldn't help but play with her for a bit until she got bored with her new toy (me) and ran off.

Oh Korea! This is why I love you! Small things, I know, but I'm easily satisfied.

No teacher! Englisheeeeeee

2009-05-29T15:58:00.012+12:00

I have a 2nd grader, Dae Sik, who's competing in a speaking contest soon and he wants me to break him of saying 'Englishee'. Initially he insisted it was pronounced 'Englishee' (hence the title) and that I, as a native English speaker, was talking out of my arse but he's since submitted to my will.

He can say 'English' OK on its own but when it's in a sentence, it's always 'Englishee'. And his speech has 2 instances where he has to say it, followed by "teacher' & 'and'. So, it's kinda cute seeing him wander around the school repeating the 'English teacher, English and/English teacher, English and' mantra over and over. {Update: He can say it properly now! He's obviously practiced a lot. I'm so proud of him!}

It was also kind of cute when, without missing a beat, he finishes his speech with "Thank you for listening. Lisa teacher, how old are you?"

Lockdown lockout

2009-05-29T10:29:00.001+12:00

Funny story out of quarrantine.

My way or the highway - the highway it is then!

2009-05-28T19:45:00.036+12:00

Yesterday my co-teacher thrust a bit of paper at me and we had the following conversations:

CT:     Sign this.
Me:     What is it?
CT:     It says you don't want to renew your contract.
Me:     But I do want to renew my contract!
CT:     Really?! You take AIDS & drug tests then? I'm very happy.
Me:     No, I won't. I've told you my position on this.
CT:     Sign this.
Me:     No.

I told her I needed to think about it and get some other opinions (friends, family etc) about it but I would try to get back to her ASAP.

So, out of that conversation, she came to the conclusion that I would turn up this morning either having changed my mind about the tests or with a signed bit of paper and told the principal and vice-principal as much. When I told her neither had happened she responded with "I very angry. Principal and Vice-Principal very angry. You promise! You break promise!"

What the hell!?

I'm seeing the ugly side of Korean 'negotiation'. There's no logic or rationale behind it. It's all histrionics, bullying, guilt and pressure. There's no middle-ground; it's "shut up, give us your blood and pee in this cup" or "hit the road". And if I hear "you want to stay, you take tests" one more time, I'll go ballistic.

I could deal with the crap from the education office if my school supported me. But they don't ("we understand your thought but..." doesn't equal support, IMHO). And the drama this morning made up my mind for me. I don't want to stay here beyond my contract. So I did my duty and signed the paper (after taking it away for a couple of hours to make her stew for a while).

The ironic thing is that, until this morning, I was considering taking the tests.

And this, in my opinion, is the really sad side of this government policy - my grade 5 kids noticed I was upset today, even though I've been trying hard to keep it out of the classroom. In our 5/6 after school class, they got together and asked me if they had done something to upset me. When I said no, they asked if they could do anything to make me happy and I nearly lost it. I've worked hard to build rapport with them and I'm very fond of (most) of them. I don't know what I'm going to say to them when they learn I'm leaving.

ESL flu panic

2009-05-28T18:20:00.004+12:00

Or should I say over-reaction.

My school hasn't asked me anything but given that we're currently not on speaking terms, that's not so surprising. I could probably rock up to school with 41 degree temperature, coughing and spluttering and making oinking sounds and they'd just steer clear of me.

Mis-education office

2009-05-27T15:55:00.012+12:00

Well, it's been a pretty crappy day so far. My school, for some inexplicable reason, thought I was going to have the HIV/AIDS & drug tests for the education office and Sue said they were all "very happy" that I'd changed my mind. When I explained to her that I hadn't changed my mind and had never said I'd have those tests, she was pretty disappointed. She said she knows the policy needs to change and that she thinks it's changing slowly. Then there was the meeting with the principal and vice-principal and they told me that they thought the tests discriminated against me but "it is our duty for education office."

=========START OF RANT!

Now, I know the facts of living & travelling abroad as I've done it many times. I'm a guest in a foreign country that has had little exposure to foreigners. I fully accept that "our ways are not their ways" and that I will have to make compromises. And I happily make those on a daily basis when I laugh off the stares, points and whispers, when I ignore the screams of 'waegookin, waegookin', when I talk to people who shove their kids at me so they can practice their English (there are lines I draw though on this one as I learned at the dink park), when I get mistaken for a Russian prostitute and propositioned by drunken ajussis, when I get told to "go home" and when I hear things like "you're a foreigner, you must know where to get drugs". This is part of the joys of traveling and living abroad - you either sink or swim when it comes to what you'll put up it in regards to discrimination/xenophobia/crazy stereotypes by individuals.

But in no country I've lived or visited have I been expected by a government agency to compromise a very deeply and widely held belief that discrimination of any kind is wrong and have tests that, in fact, promote that very discrimination.

And I think what is upsetting me the most today is my school trotting out the tired "it's our duty" line. If you know it's wrong, say it's wrong and you want it to change, why the hell would you not even try!? This whole idea that all you can do is throw up your hands and say 'maybe someday' is about as foreign to me as my reasons for not taking the tests are to them.

=========END OF RANT

OK, I'm spent.

One of my favorite things about Korea...

2009-05-26T23:38:00.004+12:00

Grade 1/2 After School class

What, they ran out of kids to beat?

2009-05-26T23:16:00.003+12:00

As much as the thought of a couple of 40-something Korean women in a cat fight amuses me, I really have to wonder what possessed these people to think this is appropriate behaviour in any work place, let alone a school?!

"we’re asking you not to interact and meet with any other foreigners for the unforeseeable future"

2009-05-26T22:51:00.006+12:00

Jesus on a cross!

Looks like the first stages the witch hunt for those with the ~~whitey~~ pig flu has begun. However, I really hope that those in the trenches (e.g. those Koreans we work with on a day-to-day basis) continue to laugh off such stupid requests from the powers that be.

Secretly though, I'd welcome the chance to loaf around at home in my PJs for a week watching TV, reading and having food delivered to my front door.

Possibly the mostest awesomest Englishee shirt yet!

2009-05-26T20:02:00.006+12:00

I'd heard about these but thought they were an urban myth (much like unicorns, yetis, the loch ness monster and an unbiased, factually correct, well-researched article from the Korea Times). I stand corrected and I am happy now.

They can be bought here.

I'm wondering...

2009-05-26T14:03:00.005+12:00

is it really so bad to laugh when one of your 4th graders gets their head stuck to the door?

Probably not, but it's certainly cheered me up. I got woken up at 5am by the melodic sounds of cats mating. Three minutes, 1 bucket of water and 2 soggy cats later and I couldn't get back to sleep. If they come around tonight, I'll... I'll... I'll give them a piece of my mind.

Big Brother... with pig flu.

2009-05-26T08:38:00.010+12:00

This is a pretty funny blog from a guy who's ~~under arrest~~ been quarrantined for suspected swine flu along with 30+ other native teachers who came to Korea via Japan. I can't wait to see the xenophobic backlash of "all foreigners have swine flu" weave its way into some crazy government policy. I wonder when the round-ups for testing will start.

I especially like the entry "U.S. Embassy Fail":

So last night we called the U.S. Embassy just to inform them of the situation. We weren’t asking for help or anything, but just because we felt they should know that, I dunno…30+ OF THEIR CITIZENS ARE BEING DETAINED! It’s not like we’re worried the Korean Health Ministry of Medicine for Make Healthy of Koreans is going to take us out in the woods, shoot us in the back of the head, dump us in a pit and throw lye over our corpses, it’s just that a few of us felt better about our government knowing where we were, which I realize is an irony as I type it.

Anyways, the lady on the phone was very helpful!

Me: “Hiya! I just thought the Embassy should be aware that 30+ U.S citizens have been quarantined right outside Seoul for suspicion of swine flu exposure.”
Operator: “Okay, well it’s a weekend, and we’re closed. Monday’s memorial day, so could you call back on tuesday?”
Me: “You…you’re serious?”
Operator: “Is it an emergency? Cause if it is we have someone we can call.”
Me: “Um…let’s see, there’s 30 americans in quarantine for swine flu exposure. Basically, we’re arrested. It’s totally cool, don’t worry—we’ll call on tuesday—”
Operator: “Okay, thanks for calling.”
Me: “No wait—”
*click*

Playing doctor

2009-05-22T00:28:00.016+12:00

My after school class is so much fun. Today we played doctor to learn body parts.

First stabilize the neck:

Make sure the patient is comfortable:

Tight, neat bandages:

Voila!

May hijinks.

2009-05-21T22:22:00.037+12:00

The dingis park (2-5 May 2009)
Jennifer, Jared and I went to Haeshindang Park in Samcheok. I can honestly say I've never seen anything quite like a park populated entirely with penises. Yep, penises. The story behind the park is as such:

Legend has it that 400 years ago a fisherman took his virgin fiancee to a rock off shore while he went off to collect seaweed. He left her there promising to pick her up but while out doing his thing, the weather turned and he was forced to abandon her on the rock and she drowned. After, the villagers of Shinnam were unable to land a good catch and it was believed that this was due to the 'tormented soul' of the horny virgin. In an attempt to appease her, the villagers began carving giant penises and performing rituals. Once they started doing this, they were able to catch fish again.

So it was that the dong park was 'erected' on this lovely spot on the east coast of Korea. Needless to say, there were more dinks than you could poke a stick at, if you're into that kind of thing. Many are very intricately carved and some a bit disturbing. But the whole thing was priceless.

The most amusing thing however was seeing all the ajummas having a pull on some of the carvings. Imagine it if you will - middle age Korean women grabbing a pants-full of life-size (and life-like) Korean fishermen statues. It just reinforces my belief that ajummas would be real goers in the sack.

Jared has a great description of the park and its history here.

Ulleung-do - I don't think so! (9-10 May 2009)
Jennifer and I decided to make a quick trip to Ulleung-do Island off the coast of Pohang. We got to Pohang on Saturday night and quickly renamed the place poontang on account of all the 'love motels' and 'business clubs' that litter the city. We checked into 1 such love motel for the night (they're cheap and usually clean and comfortable) and gave the owners quite a shock. I don't think they could wrap their heads around 2 girls checking into 1 room together and I'm sure they're still talking about it. It was a classy place. We had a huge roundish, red bed and a fine selection of sex-toys from the local vending machine in the hall.

We got to the ferry terminal the next morning only to find we'd been gazumped by a tour group. So, no Ulleung-do. We then decided to go to Daegu, which was only an hour or so by bus. Jared joined us Saturday night and we had a good time checking out the center of the city.

I really like Daegu. It's got great shopping and cafes, a nice downtown and is easy to get to from Hogye by train. As a bonus, they have a fish foot spa/cafe so we went and got our feet nibbled. I love those places!

Jen's got a good rundown of our weekend on her blog.

Come for a night/stay for a week!
Neil got back from China, wanting to stay at my place 'for a night' so he could sort his stuff from his apartment in Hogye. I thought he was pushing it if we wanted to do it all in 1 day. In the end he stayed a week and got all his stuff packed and sent back home. It was great to spend some time with him before he leaves Korea permanently. And it's not like he did an Angus (my ex-friend who outstayed his welcome by about 3 months when I was living in Wellington).

"You bery pretty eyes" - what the heck!?
We had our Open Day on Tuesday, which is were the Ulsan Provincial Office of Education (POE) comes to evaluate the school and its teachers. Sue and I had an Open Class so all the POE officials watched one of our English classes. I did the lesson plan and Sue put in a lot of effort into the resources. We practiced quite a bit, especially on Sue's English, which is getting much better. In the end, the class was a huge success and the POE officials said Sue and I worked well together. Then it got a bit "Korean" - in evaluating me as a teacher, they said lots of nice things like "kids love you" and "you class bery fun & active" and then the corker from one woman- "you bery pretty eyes". Then she asked me if I had a boyfriend!

When it came to our co-workers giving their opinion on our class, one woman got up, started talking then burst into tears and blubbered her way through her speech. She then sat down and carried on crying for about 10 minutes. No idea what that was about.

Last night all the staff went out to celebrate the success of our Open Day. My co-workers very specifically put Yong-Ho, a male co-worker who acts a little 'strange' around me, across from me at the table and he spent half the time just staring at me. Sue and the VP were making a special effort to get us to talk to each other. Koreans love matchmaking and I was wondering if that's what they were doing. This combined with his deep sighs of "You bery beautiful & smart." was making me really uncomfortable. Then he tells me he's married and his wife is expecting their first baby in October, carries on with the googly eyes/ OTT compliments and then says "I inbite you for dinner." This all in front of my co-workers who didn't see anything unusual about it. And Koreans think we have moral problems!

Maybe he just wanted me to teach his unborn baby English...

Dirty foreigner?

2009-05-21T14:21:00.024+12:00

It's been an interesting week that has resulted in me being unsure if I'll be staying with my school for another year, as planned.

The Ulsan Provincial Office of Education (POE) requires that all Native Teachers (that's us foreigners) have a health check before we can re-sign our contracts. This is par for the course - POEs throughout the country require both Korean & foreign teachers to have these at the end of our 1st, 3rd, 5th etc years. All good so far.

However, part of the health checks for foreigners includes HIV/AIDS and drug tests that our Korean counterparts don't have to do (the POE confirmed this when I called). I deeply resent the notion that simply because I am not Korean I'm somehow dirty, less moral or more likely to engage in the risky behaviour that would see me contracting/spreading HIV/AIDS or get into legal trouble over drugs. If anyone can give me a factual basis for this, I'm happy to change my mind.

I've told Sue, my co-teacher, that while I'm happy to take the same health check all Korean teachers have, I have a real issue with the HIV/AIDS and drug tests as I think they're discriminatory. She doesn't really understand my objections ("Oh, you have AIDS?") and keeps telling me "education office wants this & we do what they say." Well, she might - I don't think I can.

My co-teacher has said that these tests are also required for immigration. So what? I've already passed these tests for immigration when I arrived. I'm not entering Korea; I'm a Korean resident (albeit a temporary one). Plus I've received an email from immigration saying that health checks are valid for 3 months so I'd have to have another one when I get my E2 renewed later in the year.

And I don't have an issue with any of the tests, HIV/AIDS & drug tests included, for immigration because they can let in whoever they want (and these checks are part of many country's immigration requirements). If my visa had expired and I had to do a visa run, I could sort of understand as I don't think the visas are continuous. One expires, you leave the country then you have to re-enter and get a new one. But I'm already here, have already passed the tests for immigration and my visa is still valid. I must have these test or the POE won't allow me to renew my contract.

Contrary to popular belief amongst some friends ("We're 2nd class citizens and have no rights here. Surely you know that!?"), we do have rights here as guaranteed under the Korean Constitution, which applies to foreigners living in Korea and one of these is the right not to be discriminated against.

Someone said to me "Really, it's just a health check. What are you hiding?" but I think that totally misses the point. I'm not hiding anything; I don't do drugs (never have), I'm most definitely HIV negative and will have no problems with any of the tests. But it seems to me that the only reason I must have them is because I'm a foreigner and, therefore, am a threat to my students. And the fact the POE says I have to or I can't renew my contract really burns me.

My objection is also hygienically based. Last year when I had my 'dirty foreigner' health check, they gave us a cup for the urine test with no lid. We all went and did our thing and took our sample back to the doctor. He then put some into test tubes. At the same workspace, he then took blood - all of this was done without washing his hands or using gloves. Some people thought it was funny but it just made me feel sick.

I really like my job and I'm good at it. My co-workers are awesome and my students are loads of fun. I do want to stay another year but don't know if I can do it if it means towing the discrimination line. My sister made a good point that if I refuse to take the tests and my contract isn't renewed because of it, no one wins and I see the truth in that but I feel like I'd be compromising myself if I did take the tests. Am I willing to do that?

Now, what to do? Do I refuse to take the tests or do I submit to the indignity of them and carry on making noise about the discrimination that entails?

Kiwis & Aussies - start brushing up on your Korean skills!

2009-04-29T19:37:00.006+12:00

I'm not sure if this is a piss-take or not, especially when the writer states that:

Korean would be taught at schools at all levels by Korean teachers with high proficiency in English. Korean would be used along with English in all public documents and road signs.

If it's for real, I can't image any Kiwis or Aussies going "Hey, that's a great idea. I'm in!"

It would, however, make a great Tui "Yeah, right" ad...

What's wrong with this picture?

2009-04-25T20:50:00.003+12:00

Korean maps never fail to amuse me.

To stay or not to stay...

2009-04-18T21:58:00.006+12:00

So, my school has given me my contract for 2009/2010 - again. My co-worker, Sue, is going hard out to convince me to stay for another year. I'm really up in the air about it. When they first gave me the contract at the beginning of February, there was no question of me staying. My reasons were thus:

2008 - it sucked. After Dad died, I found it really hard to get enthused about anything. I lived in 4 countries last year and, while I enjoyed them, I was always sad and didn't feel like I got the most of out of it.
Weather - winter in Ulsan is not pleasant. It's bitingly cold and dreary. If Ulsan had been blanketed in snow, I could've coped better but the landscape was an endless vista of dead, brown trees, concrete and frozen fields. As someone who's always had my moods affected by the weather, I found it rough going;
The job - I wasn't really enjoying my it for various reasons. I had no control over how we taught the curriculum and the endless 'listen & repeat' and lame activities thought up by the Ulsan Office of Education (or whoever wrote their curriculum) nearly put me into a coma. I really disliked most of the 6th graders. Most of my co-workers, while very nice and friendly, didn't speak a word of English so I was feeling pretty isolated;
Illness - I was sick for about 4 months. Most native teachers were in the same boat. Constantly being around kids who have no concept of basic hygiene will do that.
Ulsan - it's hard to get around and English isn't widely spoken. I'm also about an hour on a bus outside of central Ulsan so I feel like I'm out in the sticks sometimes.

Now that spring and the new school year has rolled around, I'm having second thoughts about my decision. So in weighing up the pros and cons, it looks something like this:

Pros

I like Korea!
Weather - Korea is so pretty in spring and there's loads to do. It's a lovely spring night and, as I type this, I've got the windows open and kids are playing on the street and in the park downstairs.
Lifestyle - I've got a nice apartment and I'm not at all stressed. There are enough hours in the day to comfortably do my job and leave it at work at 5pm. My time outside of work is my own. I've mostly figured out my way around and how to use the transport here and I've got my bike. My Korean has improved a bit (but it still sucks). Plus, I don't really feel ready to leave Korea; it's a fun and interesting place.
Friends - I've made some really good friends here, many of whom have signed on for a 2nd year.
The job - I like it a lot. Last year's 6th graders are now someone else's problem. Sue and I work well together and she makes an effort to involve me in things at school. We have a load of new teachers, a new principal and a new vice-principal. I'm doing all the lesson plans for our classes so, while I'm following the curriculum, we're doing more interesting things and the kids seem more engaged. Plus, they're more comfortable around me now and they're a lot more fun.
Money - Korea is cheap to live in (especially since I don't pay rent or have a car) and I'm managing to save quite a bit.
Experience - while it's generally recognised in ESL circles that the Korean way of teaching isn't exactly conducive to learning (it's all rote learning), if you've taught here there are a few advantages. Firstly, if you understand how they want you to teach, you understand how not to teach. Second, as I'm writing my own lesson plans and Sue & I are trying to teach outside the box, I'm definitely getting some good teaching experience (and using my hard-earned CELTA certificate) which, hopefully, will stand me in good stead for future jobs in other countries, even if it is in Korea.
My frame of mind has improved quite a bit and I'm starting to get interested in my surroundings again.

Cons

I'm a bit restless and want to travel and a year may be a bit too long. I could quite happily do 6 months.
I want another adventure and staying is the 'safe' option.
I'd have to do another winter in Ulsan.

Options

Not to renew and go back to New Zealand for a while before heading off again at the beginning of 2010. I'd probably return to Korea but try for a job in Seoul starting in March 2010 (the new school year in Korea). The downside is that there's no guarantee I'd end up in a school as great as the one I'm in now with awesome co-teachers and fun, down-to-earth kids. Big city kids in Korea can be pretentious pains in the arse and I don't want to end up teaching spoiled Gangnam princesses in a high-stress environment. And I'd have to go through the whole E-2 visa process again, which is a bit of a nightmare.
Renew and suck up the winter and reward myself with a few months travel from September 2010. I'd have to take advantage of as many holidays and long weekends as possible though.

I've got to find out a few things from Sue. Would she still be my co-teacher for 2010? What's the E-2 visa process for renewals? Oh yeah, and what's the pay? It's not stipulated in my new contract.

So, what should I do? The internal debate continues to rage...

My satellite is bigger than yours...

2009-04-16T00:59:00.003+12:00

Oh no, I hope this doesn't turn into another one of those North Korea/South Korea "my flagpole is bigger than yours" type of competition....

Nation's First Rocket to be Launched in July
Wednesday, April 15, 2009 18:47:15

The nation's first rocket is being test-loaded on the launch pad at the Naro Space Center in Goheung, South Jeolla Province. The launch date is scheduled for late July. The Korea Aerospace Research Institute (KARI) said, it will check the parts of the space launch vehicle KSLV-1 and test its fueling process for the next two months. The KSLV-1 is a two-stage rocket that weighs 140 tons. It is 33-point-five meters long and the diameter is two-point-nine meters. The payload will be a domestically developed satellite.

Those crazy Muftis

2009-04-13T20:58:00.002+12:00

I'm not sure what planet this guy is on. More here.

I'm all for respecting other peoples' cultures and religions, but marrying an 8 year old girl to a 47 year old man simply beggars belief. They're children, not commodities to be traded for their family's convenience.

And to say that Sharia law isn't unjust to women is something only a man who follows Sharia law would say.

Sexism is alive and thriving in Korea.

2009-04-12T00:30:00.009+12:00

This from Korea Beat about 25 women-only parking places in Iksan, kindly "offering aid to unskilled women drivers." Personally, the times that I've nearly been knocked off my bike, run over in parking lots etc - it's been by male drivers and men parking.

The Daily Show...

2009-04-11T23:16:00.003+12:00

on North Korea's missile launch. Funny as hell!

Wow, that's not racist at all!

2009-04-09T01:22:00.003+12:00

More English teacher bashing in the media.

What ignorant rot!

Naver awesome-ness!

2009-04-09T01:19:00.005+12:00

I just tried Naver's dictionary to translate "고양이들은 쥐를 먹이로 삼는다" (cats use mice for food) and liked what I got...

Thanks Korea Beat!

Korean guidebook from the 80s on keeping yourself safe.

2009-04-07T19:35:00.001+12:00

Funniest thing I've seen in a while.

Next time I seen a car coming at me on the sidewalk, I shall endeavor to make a daring jump forward.

Wonder Baby - OMFG!

2009-04-07T19:24:00.003+12:00

This makes me want to puke.

I can't believe Koreans think this is OK... it's not cute, it's not impressive. It's just f**ked up!

Hep A in Korea

2009-04-07T00:40:00.004+12:00

Perhaps the so called health experts should look at some basic hygiene such as:

not sneezing all over each other;
covering your mouth when you cough;
blowing your nose, not just wiping it on your sweatshirt (or the kid next to you);
don't lick the kid next to you;
washing your hands after giving someone a 똥침;
washing your hands after using the toilet;
flushing used toilet paper (not just putting in the bin next to the toilet).

Just a thought...

Spring has sprung!

2009-04-06T23:42:00.022+12:00

On Saturday, my co-teacher, Sue, took me to her house for lunch. She lives in a lovely part of town next to Ulsan Grand Park. We (me, Sue, her husband, Big Paul, and her son, Little Paul) went for a bike ride in the park and then went for a walk. Overall, it was one of the most beautiful days I've had in Korea so far. I think spring has given me a whole new take on the place. The cherry blossoms are out and it's getting lovely and warm. There are lakes, swimming pools, out-door theatres and loads of hiking trails at the park. I can see myself spending lots more time there. We went out for dinner after the park and stuffed ourselves stupid.

I can honestly say that it's not a good idea to give a 7 year old free reign at a Korean buffet.

Little Paul is now my favorite kid. I've met him before. Last time he was pretty shy but he gave me some of his soft toys. This time he gave me some of his magic kit and wrote me a nice note (above). I gave him a block of New Zealand dark chocolate and any lingering shyness was given the boot after that. He's very smart and I can even have a converstaion with him in English. Given that most Korean kids will suddenly go all stupid and simply say 몰라요 (I don't know) when you ask them the most basic of questions, like 'What's your name?", having a real conversation with a 7 year old Korean child is quite an achievement. I suspect he'll be bored stupid when he hits the English curiculum in the Korean school system.

Well, that's OK then!

2009-04-06T22:48:00.004+12:00

This out of North Korea:

"According to North Korea's official media, not only did the country successfully send a communications satellite into orbit, but "it is sending to the Earth the melodies of the immortal revolutionary paeans 'Song of General Kim Il Sung' and 'Song of General Kim Jong Il.'"

Does Kim Jong-il really think the world buys this crap?!

On the other hand, my mobile phone has suddenly started sending me many broadcast messages and playing strange songs so maybe I'm being cynical.

Did they or didn't they?

2009-04-06T20:56:00.007+12:00

The big news here is the launch by North Korea of its 'satellite' yesterday and I've been watching various online news sites with interest to see what, if any, the response from the U.N. Security Council. So far it's been very little, which doesn't really surprise me given the complex nature of the issue and relations on this side of the world.

I'm not entirely sure what's going on as I've seen conflicting stories about whether North Korea actually managed to put something in orbit or not or whether such a launch is a violation of the UN SC resolution banning Pyeongyang from firing ballistic missiles or not. The US, Japan etc says it is, North Korea says it isn't and China and Russia seem uncertain. Regardless of whether they actually got anything into orbit or violated the resolution, simply launching the thing seems to have opened a can of worms.

I think the North Korean regime is a dumb as a bag of rocks and would cut off its nose to spite its face if it meant it could piss off a few nations off in the process. As far as I'm concerned, Kim Jong-il lives in a delusional world where he's the target of a grand imperialist vendetta, valiantly standing up against the forces of evil to further the glory of North Korea. He's surrounded by people too afraid or brainwashed to tell him what's really going on and the North Korean people are too concerned with day-to-day survival to do anything. And that's what really makes my blood boil about all this - Pyeongyang could've bought 3 years worth of rice with the money it used testing this thing. In one of her Facebook blogs, a friend said something along the lines that if ever there was leader who needed a bullet, it was this guy and, as much as I abhor the idea, I have to agree with her (can we throw in Robert Mugabe while we're at it?).

Sanctions? I can't see them doing any good. Any sanctions are sure to cause further suffering to ordinary North Koreans, which would be a disgrace. Kim Jong-il has proven time and time again that he doesn't give a rat's arse what the rest of the world thinks and has no problems imposing further hardships on the North Korean people to prove a point. It would also provide fodder for him; he could easily point to the already terrible conditions in his country and blame it on the sanctions.

Bombing? I just read an article that said that Philip Zelikow, who worked in the State Department during the Bush Administration, is advocating the bombing of North Korea in retaliation for the launch. Scarily enough, 57% of American voters seem to agree with this. Have we learned nothing from Iraq and Afghanistan?! You can't simply bomb a country into subservience. Every action has a consequence and, in a country where you've got an irrational leader running around with nuclear weapons and, now, a payload delivery system, the consequences are truly frightening. While I admit that lobbing a missile at Pyeongyang would give me a personal sense of satisfaction, it's such a short-sighted and knee-jerk reaction that it borders on the ridiculous.
Besides, the moment the US responds with military force, it plays right into Kim Jong-il's hands. His propaganda of American aggression and his position as its victim is proven correct (at least in his mind) and I think that would give him an open field (again, in his mind) to respond in any manner he deems fit; let's not forget those nuclear toys he can now throw out of his cot. I can just see a major confrontation arising in the DMZ and incursions into South Korea. If Kim Jong-il has no regard for the North Korean people, how much do you think he'll have for the South Korean people?

I spoke to a few Korean friends about the missile launch. Strangely enough, they seem remarkably unfazed. I guess they're just used to all the argy-bargy that regularly comes out of Pyeongyang. One even chuckled and said 'Kim Jong-il, he is crazy. We ignore." Maybe he's got something there...

I heart Konglish!

2009-03-31T23:00:00.001+13:00

My favorite video this week:

2009-03-24T00:58:00.003+13:00

Sesame Street explains the Bernie Madoff scandal.

Great job guys!

2009-03-22T22:54:00.006+13:00

Stolen from Brian in Jeollanam-do. Too bad the makers of the sign (Suncheon Office of Education) were unable to locate an English teacher to proof-read...

From the "Too Good To Be True" file...

2009-03-20T01:47:00.003+13:00

Not that I ever believed a word of Peter Hughes' blog but I'm rethinking my imminent move to North Korea after reading this. But I hear they've got a pretty good Italian restaurant.

An hour of heavy pettting - well worth the $5.

2009-03-20T01:36:00.004+13:00

My friend in New Zealand sent me this link. What an awesome idea! I wonder if there's anything like this in Korea.

Seriously?!?

2009-03-19T22:16:00.008+13:00

English speakers who can read Hangul will understand why I find this poster for the movie "Push" pretty amusing. As my friend Chris said "It's the movie every guy has been trying to get into."

I think I'll try North Korea for my next teaching post.

2009-03-18T22:22:00.006+13:00

I wonder how much soju one has to drink to get this take on life in North Korea.

Perhaps I'm cynical...

2009-03-18T22:13:00.004+13:00

but I'm sure the prospect of being lynched if he was ever released, which may have eventually happened if you leave off the murder charge, had something to do with Josef Fritzl's change of plea.

Here's hoping he stays in prison for the rest of his miserable life. Not very charitable I know but this this animal (I apologize to all animals out there) deserves the same compassion he showed his daughter - which would be exactly zero.

"Have you ever thought about the happiness of your child?"

2009-03-17T01:20:00.007+13:00

I saw this article in the JoongAng Daily tonight and, after laughing my arse off at the mother's confusion over the above question, it got me thinking. As a relative new comer to Korea, I'm still getting my head around why Korean mothers feel the need to send their kids to so many hagwons. As someone who always struggled academically, I've never been convinced that studying harder equals greater knowledge. In fact, in my experience, studying harder only equals certain exhaustion, much frustration and a headache.

I'm somewhat stumped at how hard Korean mothers push their kids and how little time Korean kids have to just be kids. Each day, I have at least 1 sad, exhausted looking child dragging themselves into class and many days (usually later in the week) "How are you?" is met with a chorus of "Oh, Lisa teacher, I'm soooo tired." And hearing a 12 year old say that they're afraid of their mother because they got a bad mark in school never fails to horrify me.

There's so much pressure on these kids that many of them just seem old beyond their years, beaten down by a system that encourages fierce competition and has no concept of how to cope with kids who don't learn within the very rigid Korean system of teaching. And I teach in an elementary school!

There seems to be a widespread belief amongst Korean mothers that if their child has a couple of free hours a week to do 'kid' things, that time is wasted. Enter the hagwon system; there are hagwons for everything from maths to piano to 'how to be a good bride' (not necessarily for elementary schoolers). Korea's crazy for hagwons.

But how much good does it really do them? Whenever I struggled with my high school algebra, it always crossed my mind "I'm never going to use this. Why do I need to know it?" and that's how I look at English here. My school is in a lower socio-economic area so, realistically, how many of these kids are going to be given the opportunities that make certain skills such as English necessary?

There are also the social implications; if a child is at school until 3 and hagwons until after 10, when does a family have time to be a family? And how long before Korean children, effectively being raised in a hagwon by other Korean children, start behaving out of characters from "Lord of the Flies" (many do already)?

The only conclusion that I can come to is that having a child who can, for example, speak English is a status symbol for the parents and everything else falls by the wayside. I'm fairly cynical but this strikes even me as particularly selfish and short-sighted. I've tried to play devil's advocate here but I honestly can't come up with any other reason.

A venture that's bound to fail

2009-03-16T02:22:00.007+13:00

In a country that is chronically short of the basics like food, I'm sure an Italian restaurant will go down a treat. Now if only people had money to buy a meal...

Is Jeju for sale?

2009-03-15T18:37:00.003+13:00

I anxiously await the Korean reaction to this little gem.